This is what I miss. I miss the feeling. I miss the ambiance. I miss the people. And most of all, I miss sharing my talent. I want to be an inspiration to others. Being an inspiration is very hard responsibility, because you have to prove to them not only for yourself that you can maintain and improve your skills that you have. And an inspiration is not all about talents and skills, it's all about God. People inspires you not only because of your talent, it's because they can see how God living on you, how God plans your life, how God touch your heart and others. They can see on you how God loves us. That's a real inspiration. And I think that's why I really admire LSDC Street and UP Street, because I can see on these people how God moves in their lives. Not all people can see that, and the reason why they're standing in front of many people and share their talents to show to all of us how God is great. How God creates a beautiful life. How God touches our hearts. I know all of people know who is God, know in their mind but not in their heart. Well, if you know God in mind, you can say God is good but not came from heart. But if you know God in your heart, there's no need an evidence to show how God is great. Because you can see it in yourselves.
My friends know me as an easy go person, they also know that I really love God, but you know the truth? Yes, I really know God, I know how He works my life, I know how much He loves me. But sometimes, I doubt Him. I doubt everything about Him. I failed Him. I lied to Him, even though He really knows the truth. I make Him cries. I make Him suffers. But at the end of every day, I always come to Him. I don't know why. All I can think the reason behind that is, I need Him. I trust Him. I really need to trust Him, because I know He knows what He's doing in my life. And I know every happenings in my life has a reason. For now, I don't know the reasons, but one day I will know it and I can say that "it's worth it".
For the 4 years being on the stage, God gave me the reason why I'm standing in front of many people. He wants me to help Him to show how much He loves us. And for that 4 years, I learn how to dance with a heart, a heart that God touched, a heart the willing to share, a heart that glorify God. It's exciting to dance, but it's more exciting to dance if you know God will also dance with you. :) You can't explain that feeling. It's like a cotton, your feeling is very light. All you feel is happiness and love. :) That's what I miss the most. Dancing with a heart, with God.